I never did make a very big deal about my birthday. I never really liked the attention. I always felt bad about getting gifts.
This year is no different. Except that I wish everyone could completely forget, or at least ignore that it's my birthday. Without Mommy, I don't really have any desire to celebrate another year of life. This past year has been the hardest of my life. I don't even want to celebrate it being over, I just want to crawl away and forget it ever happened. I don't want to forget what I learned, just how I learned it.
What I wouldn't do to have this past year play on repeat...even though it was living hell, I'd take it in less than a heartbeat.
{Behind that weathered door, I thought it would be safest.
My head is dizzy now, I thought we’d overcome.
We might not make it home tonight.
Crawling on the ash, she's pitiful.
::Barcelona; Get Up}
-A Perspective
